The goal:
Do not give a damn what anyone thinks about you
The obstacle:
Feeling automatically scrutinized and self esteem feels under threat whenever out in public
The solution:
Get out of your head
How:
This is the tough part- how can I not think about myself? How can I stop an automatic habit of needing to be conscious of how I'm projecting myself? Can I stop scanning for evidence to support fears that I am a useless, pathetic person, ugly, worthless (or not)? Can I not worry that I will hurt people by saying the wrong thing or make myself look stupid and valueless?
Idea #1
Find a new way to channel my mental energies. Instead of concentrating on how I am being/acting/coming across and what I'm thinking, really think hard about what I want and what I can do or say to make my experience of any given situation and life in general more enjoyable or productive.
Idea #2
Ditch fears. Remind myself that doing whatever I do, (even if it means walking around naked or saying what's on my mind) will not kill me! As long as I'm not rude, offensive or hurting anyone, it is unlikely that something bad will happy and NO ONE has the right to criticise. If they do, then realize that they are effectively saying "I'm an idiot scum bag and I'm going to make you feel bad to make myself feel good"- How ridiculous it would be for me to value the wrong, uneducated opinion of a scum bag stranger over intelligent, genuine people who aren't criticising arse holes!
Training myself out of this 'in my own head' habit will take A LOT of work if indeed it is possible.
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