I'd taken a lot of time out from my self development. Life got in the way and I got busy.
Today I sat down to watch a TV Documenary about personalities. It explained theories about why some people are more stressed and anxious than others and how anxiety levels can be changed through mindful meditation and conscious positive focus exercises.
It's another sound bit of proof which contributes to the whole "you get what you focus on in life" theory. Look for the positive and you'll get it, look for the negative and you'll get it.
I really want to be more positive and less anxious, but there's obviously some kinda reasoning going on in my head which stops me from adjusting myself to a more positive mindset.
I would guess my brain thinks that anxiety and negative thinking helps: prepare me better for negative outcome, lets me plan for future events better, the added pressure I give myself can motivate me to avoid potential bad scenarios, allows me to see a more balance view of reality, pushes me to keep standards as high as possible.
Perhaps I fear I would lose the above benefits if I were to be this blind, fuzzy-headed optimist?
I keep fluctuating between valuing happiness as the ultimate goal and maintaining a realistic view of the world. Happiness wont earn me money and allow me to survive. Then again, perhaps being a happier person will be the catalyst for life changes that will allow me to gain more than ever before?
Perhaps when I am ready, I can begin mindful meditation and conscious positive focus exercises with the hope that it will lead me to a better existence?
